Things are probably going to pick up here!
First and foremost, I am so happy to learn that 59,115 people are subscribed to my website. In addition to that, 56,354 people like my page on Facebook.
That’s 115,460 people I am knowingly reaching every time I post something.
I kept asking…am I making a good impression? Is this right?
Yes, apparently so!
So, before we get any farther…make sure to subscribe at the bottom of this blog! That option is available through the site!
I am so fortunate to have so many readers and subscribers, thanks so much!
As a Minority Female Science Fiction/Fantasy Author Who Loves Love!-
I am multi racial, but in America I’m black. I am a woman.
I’ve been stepped on, abused, lied to and on, used, and neglected since birth. I was told I’d grow up to be a rich man’s wife because I was cute and worthless.
The same person convinced me to marry young-I was twenty. We divorced-he cheated and had another child. I forgave him, but still had a lot of chips on my shoulder. I was 25 with two kids, no job and a severe case of systemic lupus. At the age of 23, I was hospitalized with a clot in my lungs.
At the age of 26, I found myself in an abusive relationship, only to wind up in a five year long one-right after. I blame my upbringing, lack of confidence and fear.
When it finally ended, I finished ten novels, had a large fan base earned on my own, with a net worth close to $500k, and that was just the beginning.
On social media, I became friends with all sorts-celebrities big and small. In July 2019, the beginning of the rest of my career started. I was asked for a script I magically procured in two weeks. The person behind the operation continuously sang my praises, but I wasn’t ready to hear it.
I wasn’t done crying and hating people for hurting me. I wasn’t done being afraid I couldn’t provide for my kids…
I wasn’t done hating myself.
When I decided to love myself, I saw a light over my work that made more sense and shined brighter than I could ever realize. It was when I officially walked away from my ex.
I ran into my soulmate, who I hired for a character FOR MY FILM…
That…I was told…is so rare that it almost never happens. Every morning, he waits for me to wake up to tell me, “You’re fucking amazing.” I’m not allowed to say thank you, instead, he suggested I say, “Yes, you’re right. I am.”
Every night, I fall asleep asking questions, laughing at his dirty jokes and thanking the stars we found each other.
But I didn’t find him by chance or see the beautiful lining of originality in my work without LETTING GO.
When I say letting things go, you truly have to be ready to do so. When you begin to love yourself, everything begins to change. All of my hard work, goals finished, books completed, art showcased…
It didn’t amount to taking that deep breath and then seeing everything for what it’s worth…and for what it really is. It is an everyday reminder…and sometimes I want to throw people off the second floor I stay on…but in the past…I didn’t see how it would affect me to lash back at the people hurting me. I only saw myself feeling relieved because someone else was unhappy.
I have learned not to let unhappy people dictate your life. They would love to because they’re unhappy…don’t let them. It isn’t their job to tell you where your soul goes when everything is all said and done for you.
I’ve also learned to not give them light. I used to continuously speak on my problems and all my worries and it never helped. It kept me in a circle, and it seemed like I never got anywhere. Until the day I decided to forgive people who’ve hurt me. Sometimes you have to do it everyday. Sometimes you don’t, but always remember that fighting fire with fire creates a different fire.
But being burned, once or twice means you should learn from that lesson…because burns heal over time. Look at it like a battle scar…and move on.